The Doctor's Resolutions
by montypython203
Summary: Part of the Resolutions series. The Doctor's POV as he completes his resolutions.
1. Chapter 1

_Title: The Doctor's Resolutions_

_Rating: K+_

_Summary: The Doctor's POV as he completes his resolutions._

_Disclaimer: (using recycled Rove joke) I own Doctor Who. Yeah right! And Anthony Callea's gay ... what? ... oh how awkward ..._

_Author's Note: I'm soooooooooo sorry it's taken so long to get this up! Hopefully I'll be updating regularly, though I can't make any promises._

**1. I will learn how to work Rose's MP3 player.**

I'd been working on the TARDIS for a while. Rose was sitting near me, listening to her MP3 player. Honestly the guy who invented portable music was a genius, I love him. When in old times having a song stuck in your head meant it was just in your mind (which it still is, I always get Kylie's "Can't Get You Out Of My Head" stuck in my head, funny that), now you can actually have a song playing in your head, stuck in with headphones. Brilliant. Anyway, I was bored, so I figured hey, may as well listen to a tune myself.

"Hey Rose," I said. "Do you think I could have a listen to your MP3 player?"

"Oh, uh, I guess so," said Rose. "Would I have any songs you like?"

"What have you got?" I asked.

"I've got some Delta Goodrem, Kelly Clarkson, James Blunt …"

"Oh, I'm sure I'll find something," I said. Rose nodded and turned off the device. She then threw it to me.

"There you go," she said. I held it in my hands, clueless. Just because I wanted to listen to it didn't mean I knew how it worked.

"Um, how do you turn this thing on?" I asked.

"Press the third button on the bottom," Rose answered. I did so. Nothing happened.

"It's not working," I complained. Rose sighed and came over.

"You have to hold it down," she said, demonstrating. "There you go. Okay now?" I began to nod, then stop.

"No," I said. "How do you select a song?" For a moment Rose was silent, then a small smile crept along her face.

"Do you mean to tell me," she began, "that you can operate a machine that travels through time and space, you can defeat aliens and save the world … but you don't know how to work an MP3 player?" I bit my lip.

"Yes mam," I said. Rose burst out laughing.

"Well the Time Lords weren't really very musical," I said. "Not like you apes. And as for rap … Rose will you stop laughing!"

"Sorry, sorry," said a still giggling Rose. "Okay, press the third button to go to menu. Now press that one there to find a song you like. Oh, they're all arranged in folders for each CD they come from. You've gotta go into the folder to see what songs are on it. To get back out just press the menu button I showed you before."

"Uh huh," I said. "Okay, I've found a song I like." I saw Rose have a peek at my song choice: Sexy Back. I blushed.

"Now press that one," Rose said.

"But that's the ON/OFF button," I said, confused.

"When you hold it it's that, when you press it it's PLAY/PAUSE/SELECT."

"Oh," I said. I pressed the button and the song started playing. It was too loud. Rose saw my distress and pressed the volume button. The volume showed up in the screen.

"Press that one to turn it down," Rose instructed. But I was too late. The volume screen had vanished, and my actions had caused the previous song to play.

"Bloody hell!" I exclaimed.

"You were too slow," Rose said.

"Why don't you just put more buttons on these things?" I said.

"Convenience," Rose replied.

"Well it's not being very convenient right now," I muttered.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

_Poor Doctor! I like writing him a lot more than writing Rose. We're both ramblers, so that helps lol. Please review!_


	2. Chapter 2

_Thanks for your reviews so far! I hope this chapter will be to your satisfaction :)  
_

**2. I will take Rose to all the places we intended to go but didn't coz the TARDIS stuffed up.**

"Rise and shine, Rose!" I exclaimed happily.

"Bugger off," Rose said sleepily.

"I'm afraid I can't do that," I said. "We've got a big day ahead of us. And it's starting with Naples, 1860."

"Oh yeah, you never did take me there," Rose said.

"Exactly," I said. "And now I'm going to make it up to you. I'm going to take you everywhere we intended to go but didn't."

"That'll take a while," said Rose.

"Eh heh, yes, that's why we've gotta get moving," I said. "So get dressed!"

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

"Bloody hell," Rose said between breaths. "That was close." I scratched behind my head.

"And unexpected," I said.

"Yeah, it's not every day you materialise in the middle of a drunken brawl," said Rose. "What were they arguing about again?"

"As I recall, whose Mama's pasta was the best," I replied. "Never mind. Now, let's see. The next place I said I'd take you was the Powell Estate, 12 hours after coming with me."

"What if Mickey sees the TARDIS? Or Mum sees me? We'd change history and create a paradox."

"Good point," I said. "Well we could just go into London. Get some chips."

"I dunno, I should watch my figure," Rose said uncomfortably.

"Rose, you always look beautiful," I assured her. "Besides, this life is guaranteed to keep the weight off. I've been moving about like this for 900 years, and look at me! I've always been in good shape. Apart from my second form, he could have used a few Weight Watchers meetings …"

"You're rambling Doctor," Rose said. "Okay, chips it is."

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

"Ian Dury and the Blockheads, 1979!" I announced. "I don't know why I didn't do this sooner! It's such an accomplishment to tie up all the loose ends."

"Speaking of loose ends, could you help me put my hair up?" Rose asked. "It keeps falling out." I nodded and helped Rose do her hair. I don't know why women do so much to their hair. The thing I love about my hair is I don't need to do a thing to it except wash it! Anyway, I'd just set the TARDIS to go to the concert. We landed, and I walked to the door. I could hear the crowd cheering. We were definitely at the right place. I grinned and opened the door. Standing right in front of me was Ian Dury. Literally right in front of me. We were on stage.

"Sex and drugs and rock and roll … is all my brain and body need," Ian sang. "Sex and drugs and rock and roll … is very good indeed." The rest of the band stopped, and he turned around to see why. I just stood there, gaping.

"Hi," I said. "Great concert."

"Doctor what's going … oh," said Rose coming out of the TARDIS. "Um, Doctor, I think we'd better leave."

"Yes," I agreed. "Um, Ian, we're just part of the stage effects. We're just an illusion. And we're going to go now. Bye!" I hurried back inside and got us out of there. However, I watched on the scanner screen to see Ian's reaction.

"Maybe sex and drugs and rock and roll aren't so good after all," he said.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

"Last but certainly not least, Elvis Presley," I said. "As we come to the end of our journey, I'd like to take time to reflect … oh to hell with it! Let's do this!"

"Hey Doctor, what was the point of all those Elvis movies?" Rose asked. "They didn't have good plots or anything."

"The past is another country Rose," I told her. "In this case, everyone just wanted to hear Elvis sing and watch him shake his hips. I doubt they were trying to win any awards when they made them."

"I agree with you on that," Rose said. "Okay, let's go for it." I started up the TARDIS and we landed. We linked arms and walked out of the TARDIS. We'd landed in a parking lot, and there was a sign on the building in front of us that read "Ed Sullivan TV Studios".

"We made it," I said, relieved.

"Oh my god, I'm gonna see Elvis!" exclaimed Rose. "Is he as hot as Jonathan Rhys Meyers made him look?"

"Only one way to find out," I said, dismissing the fact that Rose finds herself attracted to just about every man we meet, yet not to m… never mind. We walked towards the studio. My psychic paper let us in. We took our seats, and soon Elvis was being welcomed on.

"I thought he'd be taller," Rose murmured.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

"So, what did you think of that?" I asked.

"It was really great," Rose replied.

"Listen, I'm sorry things didn't go quite as we planned today," I said awkwardly. "It was meant to be about giving you a second chance to see all those places, and I couldn't even do that." I lowered my head.

"Oh Doctor, it's all right," Rose said. "It doesn't matter where I go as long as I'm with you." She gave me a hug.

"Thanks Rose," I whispered.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

_Today I wrote an essay for my English mid-course exam, and I don't think I did too well. To reinforce my confidence in my writing skills, please review!_


	3. Chapter 3

_This chapter makes a small reference to **Army Of Ghosts**. Let's just say they defeated the baddies and lived happily ever after, okay? _**  
**

**3. I will wear a hockey mask whenever we visit Jackie (just in case).**

I thought I'd faced everything. Daleks, Cybermen, Ice Warriors, the Master … oh how wrong I was. Never did I think that my match would come in a forty-year-old woman. I've been quite lucky this time round. Since I regenerated she hasn't been nearly as threatening. But I thought it was best not to risk it.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

"Okay Doctor, let's go," Rose called.

"Just a sec," I replied. I dug out my old hockey mask (don't ask) and put it on.

_That should give me adequate protection_, I thought. I walked into the console room and set the coordinates.

"Doctor, what the hell are you wearing?" asked Rose.

"Just a hockey mask Rose," I answered.

"Okay … why?" said Rose.

"Oh, just a precaution," I said casually. "21st century London, anything could be out there."

"Like my mother," Rose said.

"Exac-, hey!" I exclaimed. "How did you…?"

"Well, you told me yourself that slap she gave you was the first, and I'm guessing you want it to be the last," Rose concluded.

"Uh, yeah, pretty much," I admitted.

"Doctor, she only slapped you because she thought you were an internet pervert kidnapper!" Rose said.

"Oh, and I'm sure she's much more comfortable with someone endangering her daughter every day," I said.

"She knows this is what I want, okay?" said Rose. "So relax. She isn't going to slap you." I bit my lip.

"I'm still wearing it," I said. Rose rolled her eyes.

"Fine," she said. Just then the TARDIS stopped moving. We walked to the doors and opened them. Jackie was already walking towards us.

"Rose, it's so good to … AARGHH!" she cried. "Rose, it's a Sycorax!"

"Where?" asked Rose frantically.

"Behind you!" said Jackie. She then ran up to me and started slapping me wherever she could. The mask was doing its job, but the rest of me wasn't protected. She then kicked me in the …

"Oh sweet Rassilon!" I howled. I tore off the mask. "Jackie, it's me!"

"Doctor?" Jackie said. "How dare you scare me like that!"

"I wasn't trying to scare you, I just wanted to _avoid being slapped!_" I exclaimed. "I never expected it to backfire like this."

"Oh," said Jackie. She began to smile, then started giggling. Rose joined her. Before long they were in stitches.

"Stop it!" I said. "It's not funny!"

"Oh, poor Doctor," Rose said, frowning. "Did Jackie give the Doctor a booboo?"

"I don't need this," I said. "I'm going back in the TARDIS. I'll be waiting for you." With that I turned my back and left.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

"Time to visit my mum Doctor," Rose told me. "Are you going to put on your mask?"

"Very funny," I said. "I don't think that'll be necessary."

"Okay then," Rose said. We materialised, then made our way towards the flat. When we got in Jackie hugged Rose and hung on for dear life. I smiled and tried to squeeze past. But Jackie grabbed me and pulled me towards her.

"Oh no you don't. Come here!" she exclaimed. And after what happened next, I'm never visiting her without my hockey mask again.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

_Hehe, that was fun. I've got the plan for the next chapter, so it should be up fairly soon. _


	4. Chapter 4

_Sorry it's been a while, my Senior Science exam -shudders- took priority. Now, the plot for this chapter is actually stolen from a movie. I didn't intend to originally, but once I got the idea I couldn't resist! It also has a go at Buddhism, so to any Buddhists or anyone who may be offended know that I'm sorry and it's just a bit of fun. **South Park** gets away with it all the time! Anyway, enjoy.  
_

**4. I will punch the lights out of Jimmy Stones.**

About a month after we met Rose told me about Jimmy Stones. When she was 16 she became infatuated with his tattoos, his piercings, his smoking, his drinking and his 19-year-old body. He convinced her to drop out of school, telling her not to waste her life. He said he'd give her everything she wanted. He told her she was special. But then one day she walked in on him in bed with Holly Davies. And Freya Roberts. She lost trust in him. He started hitting her (if you thought being slapped by Jackie was bad, you were in for a shock). She walked out on him, and hadn't seen him since. But he hurt my Rose, and I intended to defend her honour.

"So where would we find this Jimmy Stones?" I asked her.

"Dunno," Rose replied. "Prison? Rehab? Mexico?"

"Do you have, I don't know, some hair or something from him? Something to identify him?" I asked.

"Er, why do you wanna know?" Rose inquired.

"Well, I thought we should pay him a visit," I said.

"Doctor, what are you planning?" Rose asked hastily.

"Nothing," I said. "Okay, if you must know, I want to give this guy what's coming to him."

"Doctor, just leave it," Rose insisted. "It happened years ago. I was a stupid little kid then, I didn't know what I was doing."

"And he took advantage of you," I said. "So I'm gonna make him pay."

"There's no stopping you, is there?" Rose said. I shook my head. Rose stood there for a minute, then sighed.

"Men," she said. "You know what? I've got a necklace he gave me. I kept it to remind myself never to go down that path again. Besides, I like it. It'd have my fingerprints on it as well as his, does that matter?"

"No, the TARDIS can cancel out your DNA and track his," I said. Rose nodded and ran to her room. When she came back she had the necklace. I scanned it using the sonic screwdriver, placed it on the console, hit a few buttons and we were off.

"You know what? I'm glad I'm doing this," Rose decided. "I've still got some things I need to say to Jimmy. I never did get the chance before." The TARDIS stopped.

"So where are we then?" asked Rose. "His flat? It's in a really shabby part of London. Or are we in prison? I want to see if it's really got tally marks on the wall. Mind you, if we materialised right in his cell I'd be a bit worried."

"Don't worry, we'd be at least a hundred metres away," I said. "The TARDIS can't track a person exactly, but it takes you to the basic location." I checked the scanner screen. "And judging by this, that location probably isn't prison." Rose looked at the screen. It showed a beautiful garden.

"It could be a fancy prison," she suggested.

"Well, only one way to find out," I said, grinning. I ran to the door and opened it. There were birds singing, there was water running, this was paradise! You could literally feel the peace and tranquillity.

"Blimey," said Rose. "Where are we? And where's Jimmy?"

"Hold on," I said, taking out the sonic screwdriver. "I can trace the DNA directly to the source now." I pressed a button. "It's coming from over _there_." We walked towards a large area of grass, the sonic screwdriver buzzing with excitement. Oh wait, that was me. Anyway, we turned a corner and noticed a group of men. Bald men. Wearing orange robes. Meditating. It was then that I noticed a large golden statue of Buddha (well, the technically correct term is 'the Buddha', meaning 'the enlightened one' **A/N Just flaunting the knowledge I learnt in Studies Of Religion, sorry**). These were Buddhists monks! Which meant …

"J-Jimmy?" asked Rose as she approached one of the men. He turned around.

"Rose," he said. "Oh, wow, this is unexpected. Um, hi. How are you?"

"Fine," Rose said. "And, you?"

"Terrific," Jimmy said. "About a year after we, er, ended, I started pondering the meaning of life and all that. I got involved with Buddhism and, well, here I am."

"Congratulations," said Rose.

"Thanks," said Jimmy. "So, who's your friend?" I stood there, gaping. How was I supposed to beat up a monk? Maybe those monks in 1879, but this was just ridiculous.

"Sorry, I'm the Doctor," I said, composing myself. "I'm Rose's …"

_If I can't hurt him physically I may as well go for the emotions_, I thought, "…boyfriend." Without thinking I grabbed Rose and kissed her on the lips. When I finally broke free (Rose had been clinging on, did she want more? I'll have to find out later…) I smiled at Jimmy.

"Congratulations Rose, I'm really happy for you," Jimmy said.

_Damn! _I thought. _Well, it wasn't all bad …_

"I'm glad you've found someone who'll treat you the way you deserve," continued Jimmy.

"Yeah, about that Jimmy, you weren't exactly, shall we say gentle with me," Rose said. "I looked up to you, I depended on you and you treated me like dirt. You hurt me Jimmy."

"I'm so sorry Rose," Jimmy said. "I was immature back then. A couple of years ago I actually tried to contact you to apologise, but you were a missing person."

"Yeah, I was travelling," Rose said. "No big deal. Unlike the big deal of finding my boyfriend in bed with two other women."

"I made many mistakes," Jimmy said. "But becoming a monk has changed my life. I see things so much clearer. There are no distractions. No drinking, no money, no sex …" (**A/N Monks have 227 rules for daily life!)**

"Oh, you don't know what you're missing mate," I said. Yes, I was trying to antagonise him. As much as I respected what he'd done with his life, I had a resolution to fulfil!

"I do, and I'm happy without it," said Jimmy. Damn this was a tough cookie to crack. Ever seen that episode of _The Simpsons _where Homer's trying to get Flanders mad and he just keeps smiling happily? That was what this was like.

"Still, I bet you'd love to slip into a pair of trousers again," I said. "Remember trousers Jimmy? The protection, the warmth, that comforting feeling that a gust of wind isn't going to embarrass you …" Jimmy gave a small shudder.

"I, I care about more than that now," he said. "I have dedicated my life to the Buddha, and I don't miss anything about the outside world."

"Not even … hair?" I asked, ruffling my hands through mine (this wouldn't have worked well in my last form). "I know, you guys think hair's a form of vanity. But it's just _so soft!_ You just want to run your hands through it all day … plus you can style it. I look quite good with a bit of gel in mine. But that's another problem for you … no possessions! I don't know how you do it, I'd go mad!" Jimmy was twitching now.

"You just have to … stay strong … remember why you're here …" he stammered.

"Of course, yes," I said. "To serve the Buddha. Even thought you're fully aware that he was just an ordinary bloke. You don't even believe he's a god, you don't believe he created the universe or anything. He's a guy who sat under a tree and suddenly learned the secrets of the universe. Mmm, what a guy. You should be very prou-" I'd gone too far. Jimmy punched me in the face. It hurt, it really did. Luckily Gallifreyan anatomy's stronger than a human's so I wasn't too banged up.

"Oh you're gonna get it now!" I exclaimed. I lunged at him and fell on top of him. The other monks gathered round. I punched and punched 'til I could punch no more. I fell to the side, exhausted.

"Okay," I said in between breaths. "We're even."

"Like hell we are!" cried Jimmy, giving me another punch in the jaw.

"Now Jimmy, what would the Buddha want?" I asked. "What would your fellow monks want?"

"Kill him!" they cried. "He will be reincarnated into a life of suffering!"

"Uh oh," I said. "Rose, run!" And so we were running through this beautiful garden being chased by a group of now unfriendly monks with an evil look in their eyes. The TARDIS was straight ahead. We kept on running, running … we made it. We ran inside and I slumped down onto the ground.

"Are you hurt?" Rose asked.

"I'll be fine," I said. "Just give me a minute."

"You know, that was a really mean thing you did back there," Rose said. "Making fun of a man's faith. Someone who's tried hard to change their life and you went and undid all the work they'd done." She paused. "And you did it all for me." I smiled.

"Yeah," I said. "I did, didn't I?" We hugged.

"Now you've gotta apologise," Rose said. I groaned and stood up. I opened the door a crack. The monks were heading back. I took a deep breath and opened the door.

"Hey!" I yelled. "I'm sorry!" Jimmy walked over.

"I'm sorry too," he said, extending his hand to shake. I took it.

"Now, Jimmy Stones, I've gotta go," I said. "But you look after yourself."

"I will," Jimmy said. "I won't be tempted again. Although … you do have bloody nice hair." I laughed.

"Right," I said. "Now, you know how the Buddha found the secrets of the universe? Well, I leave you now with the sound of the universe." I went back inside and started up the TARDIS, while a bewildered young monk watched, and smiled.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

_-hands out **Anger Management **DVDs to everyone who guessed the movie I stole it from- I hope that was okay. I thought it was best to give it a happy ending. Now please review, but no flames!_

_Random note: The other night I had a recurring dream that Russell T Davies died in a plane crash. Was it a premonition, or a silly thing that didn't mean anything? Let's remember that when Marty was voted out in **The Biggest Loser**, I had a dream that he came back , and he did ... _


	5. Chapter 5

_Thanks for the reviewsThis one's a little short, but I didn't want to go too far into it._**  
**

**5. I will sneak a look at Rose's diary.**

"I'm just having a shower Doctor," said Rose. "I'll be out in no more than an hour."

"An hour! My God, what's the rush?" I said with a mock expression of surprise on my face. Rose teasingly gave me a slap and went into the bathroom. I sat down on her bed, and noticed her diary sitting on the bedside table. Diaries have always fascinated me. The fact that humans feel the need to write down all their emotions into a little book, sometimes even addressing it like it's a person, it's weird. Then you've got video diaries, where you can feel like a right git just sitting there blabbering on (er, don't ask me how I know about it). Anyway, Rose's diary was pink and covered in glitter. She always writes in it, but never lets me see it. Well I thought it was about time this stopped. Yes she's entitled to privacy, but you don't write in a diary and inform the people around you about it if you don't want it to be read. It wasn't hidden, it didn't even have a lock! This was a diary that was _begging _to be read. As I approached it, I felt like a naughty little brother. And the rush of adrenaline was amazing! Who needs Daleks and Cybermen when you've got diaries?

"So close …" I said under my breath. I picked it up and opened it. The first page read THE DIARY OF ROSE TYLER – TIME TRAVELLER. I smiled and cautiously opened the next page. She'd started this particular diary in the New Year, on the day we went to New Earth.

_It's still weird with the Doctor having a new face, but he's definitely the same man. He's still got that child-like excitement about him._

"Child-like?" I said to myself. "Well, in the words of my fourth form, 'There's no point in being grown up if we can't be childish sometimes'." I continued reading.

_The day started really well. The Doctor took me to New Earth, and it was the most beautiful place we've been to by far. We lay in the apple grass together. It was really peaceful, just me and him. However, peace and the Doctor rarely go hand-in-hand, and soon we were facing an old enemy – Cassandra the last human!_

I continued to read, interested in the way Rose put things. To be honest, it didn't give me as big a thrill as I anticipated. She just described the events of the day, occasionally putting in her own thoughts. I thought she would have talked a bit more about Cassandra's, ahem, snog, but no, she just quickly mentioned it and then was onto something else. After I finished reading that particular adventure I realised that Rose would be out of the shower any minute, so I quickly left.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

_Normal POV_

Rose Tyler walked into her room, and noticed that her diary wasn't in the same position as before. She smiled to herself.

_So curiosity got the better of him_, she thought. She then opened up a drawer, reached under a pile of books and took out a book with a plain black cover. She opened it up.

THE SECRET DIARY OF ROSE TYLER THAT NO ONE KNOWS ABOUT AND THAT CONTAINS ALL THE INTIMATE DETAILS OF HER LIFE AND WHAT SHE WISHES WOULD HAPPEN REGARDING A CERTAIN DOCTOR.

"I really need to think of a better title," she muttered, and began to write.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

_I kept a diary last year. It recorded my transformation into a Whovian, my first crush, my many weird dreams ... but then I couldn't be bothered to write in it anymore and stopped. Shame. _


	6. Chapter 6

_Here's another one for you. I actually wrote it ages ago, so it might not be as good as the others._**  
**

**6. I will order a pizza to be delivered "to the big blue box".**

"What do you want for dinner?" I asked.

"Don't mind," replied Rose.

_Excellent, _I thought. "Fancy pizza?" I asked.

"Er, sure, I guess," said Rose, a little confused. "Have you got any?"

"Nope," I said, smiling. "Do you like Pizza Hut?"

"Yeah, sure," said Rose. "So we're going to Pizza Hut for dinner?"

"No, we're ordering," I said, eager to get things moving. I was getting hungry!

"Well how are we going to get it?" asked Rose.

"Haven't you ever ordered pizza?" I said.

"Yeah, but I've always had an address to order to," said Rose.

"Well let's see if you need it," I said with a grin. "Call it an experiment. 'Can you order a pizza to be delivered to a police telephone box?'"

"Ha, sounds like something the Chaser team (**A/N Aussie comedy team that makes a living ridiculing everything and doing outrageous stunts) **would do," commented Rose. "Except … we need to materialise somewhere on Earth in order for the pizza to reach us."

"Ah, good point," I said, embarrassed that I hadn't actually thought of that. I quickly started up the TARDIS, and soon we landed. I checked our coordinates.

"Epping, Sydney, Australia," I said. "It's the year 2000, oo, Sydney's got the Olympics, it's 6:00 p.m. and we're on … Lilli Pilli Street. So, what pizza do you want?" I asked as I reached for the phone.

"Just plain cheese thanks," said Rose. "And garlic bread. And Pepsi."

"Coming right up," I said as I began to dial the number. The person on the other end picked up.

"Hello?" he said.

"Yes, I'd like one large cheese pizza and one large garlic bread please," I said. "Oh, and a large Pepsi. And please deliver it to the big blue box on Lilli Pilli Street in Epping."

"Excuse me?" said the voice on the other end.

"The big blue box, Lilli Pilli Street, Epping," I repeated.

"Sir, what's your address?" the voice asked.

"Do I need to say a third time?" I said. "Listen, on the corner of Lilli Pilli Street there is a big blue old-fashioned police box. That's where I'm calling from. That's where I want the food delivered."

"Er, okay sir," the voice said. "Your food will arrive in about 20 minutes."

"20 minutes, thank you," I said. As soon as I put the phone down Rose burst out laughing.

"Whoever was on the receiving end of that must have been seriously confused," she said. "Well, now what do we do for 20 minutes?"

"Travel forward in time 20 minutes?" I suggested.

"Oh no, knowing you that could end up being 20 years," Rose said.

"Well, it's 6:00 p.m., so Channel 10 would be showing _The Simpsons_," I said. "They're going to keep playing it for a good few hundred years before they think of something else to put on. Not counting summer, of course. That's reserved for _Seinfeld_ …"

"Okay, Simpsons it is," Rose said.

About 20 minutes later there was a knock on the door. We got up and walked to the door. I opened it and there was a teenage kid there with strawberry blonde hair and bad acne.

"Er, pizza," he said in a squeaky voice.

"Cheers mate," I said, taking the food while Rose paid. However, the kid seemed to have trouble leaving. He just stood there, obviously wondering what the hell two people were doing inside a wooden box.

"Bye now," said Rose, closing the door. She then started laughing again.

"Oh, you don't know how long I've wanted to do that for," I said. "I've had the whole universe at my feet, and something as simple as ordering a pizza took me 900 years."

"Why'd you wait so long?" she asked.

"I guess I was waiting for the right person to share it with," I told her. "Someone who was serious about this, but wasn't afraid to have a laugh."

"Oh, well I'm flattered," said Rose. "Now, let's eat!"

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

_Pizza for all reviewers!_


	7. Chapter 7

_This chapter makes references to the classic series, where the Doctor's answer to just about everything was some Venusian karate. _

**7. ****I will teach Rose Venusian karate (it'd help a bit whenever she gets captured/kidnapped/taken hostage. Actually, why did I stop doing it? It used to help me a lot in the old days …).**

Rose was in the lounge room, watching TV.

"What's on?" I asked.

"The Karate Kid," Rose replied.

"You know Ralph Macchio was like, 23 in that," I said. (**A/N Which means he was 29 in the 3****rd!) **Rose gaped.

"Seriously?!" she exclaimed. "Oh my god, he looks so young! He looks younger than me! Ew, that is not a good look!" I sat down beside her.

"So what do you think of karate?" I asked.

"Hmm … I guess it'd be cool to break boards and stuff, but I don't like the idea of beating people up," Rose said.

"Oh, it's not all about that," I said. "In fact, in Venusian karate you can give people sleeper holds."

"Oh yeah?" said Rose.

"Yep," I confirmed. "And knock things out of people's hands, and block oncoming blows and strikes and stuff."

"How about that," Rose said. "So how do you know so much about it?"

"Well …" I began, scratching my head, "…I can do it." Rose turned to me.

"You can do karate," she said.

"I can do karate," I said. "And I'd like to teach you. I thought it'd help you get out of any sticky situations. How about it?" Rose opened her mouth to speak.

"So … where was this karate all this time?" she asked.

"Huh?" I said.

"Well, we've faced countless enemies together but I haven't seen you use your Venician …"

"Venusian," I corrected.

"Whatever … karate once," Rose finished. "What's the deal with that? You're asking me to pick up something new, yet here's something you've had all this time and didn't even think about!" I was speechless. Rose did have a good point. Perhaps I could have saved more people if I'd continued using it.

"Um, I guess I kinda forgot about it," I admitted. "I stopped using it after a while, can't remember why … but anyway, now's the chance for us to both do it!" Rose sat in silence, pondering the idea of it.

"I suppose … if I can do sleeper holds," she said.

"Brilliant!" I exclaimed. "Okay, for a sleeper hold you've gotta hold your hand like this … put it just there … and press down."

"Uh, okay," Rose said.

"Then I'll teach you the countless other moves. Oh, this is going to be so much fun! I'm sure I've got a simulator around here somewhere you can practise on. Ah, it takes me back to the good old days, when I used it against …"

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

I woke up in bed. Rose was standing over me, grinning.

"Wow, it really does work!" she exclaimed. I grunted.

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_Please give me something more interesting to read than study notes for Exploring Early Childhood, and review!_


	8. Chapter 8

_My exams are over! I'm free! And so this chapter was written. It makes references to the classic series (which I had to research on Wikipedia because the stupid ABC won't show it anymore), and it's not exceptionally funny._

**8. I will be more open about my life.**

None of my companions really wanted to know more about me, and if they did, they didn't show it. I was the Doctor, I took them through time and space in my TARDIS, that was all they really needed to know. But Rose is different. She's inquisitive. She wants to find the reasons for things. As Delta Goodrem said in "The Analyst":

_She's travelling back in time  
Questioning every line that someone said  
She's trying to understand_

… and so on. Anyway, it all started when she saw her father. She was so open about everything that happened. She was so open about everything in her life, so I thought it was only fair to return the favour. So when she kept dropping hints about the Time War, I decided to let loose and tell her everything she asked about (**A/N Refer to Chapter 3 of **_**Rose's Resolutions). **_It felt great to stop bottling it up and just get it out in the open. And Rose was really understanding. She helped me get through it. As Bill Withers says:

_Lean on me when you're not strong  
And I'll be your friend, I'll help you carry on  
For it won't be long_  
'_til I'm gonna need somebody to lean on_

So as time went on, I kept referring back to my past. In fact, I couldn't stop!

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

We were watching the tennis. It was Roger Federer versus Lleyton Hewitt.

"Ace!" exclaimed Rose.

"Ha," I said. "That was one of my companions."

"What?" said Rose.

"Ace," I said. "Well, her real name was Dorothy McShane. She travelled with me when I was in my second form. You would have liked her. She was a London teenager too."

"Oh," said Rose.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

"Hey Doctor, you know how when we went to 1879 you said your name was James McCrimmon?" Rose asked. "How come it wasn't John Smith?"

"Oh, Jamie was a former companion of mine," I answered. "He was Scottish, so I thought it would be appropriate. He was a little slow sometimes, but he was really smart. A real gentleman, too. He was devastated when Victoria left. Ha, and that reminds me of another companion of mine – Vicki. She was so sweet. She looked after me like I was her grandfather. And that brings me onto Susan, my real granddaughter. She travelled with me too, but then she fell in love and I didn't want her to forget about it and be burdened by me, so I let her go."

"Blimey, you sure have had your share of companions," Rose said. "Uh, does it matter that I don't think of you as a grandfather?"

"Not at all," I said. "Even though I was much younger then, I wasn't as charismatic as I am now. Being with you makes me feel years younger." Rose smiled.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

"Doctor, Mum says there's been an apparent sighting of the Loch Ness Monster," Rose said.

"Oh dear, I hope the Skarasen didn't reproduce," I said. Rose looked at me, confused. "That's its real name," I explained. "It was an alien controlled by the Zygons."

"I won't ask," Rose said. "Mum also said there's been a sighting of a Yeti."

"I met a Yeti once," I recalled happily. "Well, when I say met I mean …" But Rose had already gone to her room.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

After hearing some noises from the wardrobe room, I ran in to see what the matter was.

"Bloody thing!" exclaimed Rose.

"Rose, what happened?" I asked.

"I was just looking for a dress when I tripped on this stupid scarf!" Rose said. "How long is this thing?!"

"Don't be bagging out my scarf," I said. "I had some good times with this thing."

"You used to wear it?" said Rose in disbelief.

"Everywhere I went," I said. "Except when I went diving when investigating the Pescatons. But man, when I regenerated into my fourth form I was so out of it. You should have seen some of the stuff I tried on before I found an outfit that wasn't completely ridiculous."

"So why do you only change clothes when you regenerate?" Rose asked.

"Rose, you'd be amazed how much time you humans spend looking for the right outfit," I said. "You lose years of your lives trying on clothes, while you could be using that time to do something spontaneous and adventurous."

"You know, I never thought about it like that," admitted Rose. "I wonder how much time you lose talking about your past." I opened my mouth to answer, then realised what Rose meant. There has to come a point where 900 years of memories are too much to handle.

"Ah," I said.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

_I know that was kinda mean of Rose, but I had to stop the chapter somehow! I hope it was okay. _


	9. Chapter 9

_This chapter was a little hard to do, as it doesn't have much dialogue. It also relates back to Chapter 5 of __**Rose's Resolutions**__, so I suggest you read that if you haven't already. It's also good if you know about Little Britain._

**9. I will try to get an interest in Little Britain.**

It had been an ordinary day, well, as ordinary as you can get in the TARDIS. I sat back on the couch and turned on the TV. I was waiting for Bleak House to start. As I waited, I noticed an ad for a show I hadn't seen before. However, I was soon glad I hadn't seen it. Just from the ad, I saw a fat woman insulting another fat woman, an extremely fat woman wearing nothing but a towel and a fat man wearing some outrageous clothing. The show was called "Little Britain".

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Some time later, Rose asked me to watch a show she liked. When she told me it was Little Britain, I freaked out. I didn't want anything to do with that show. But I wanted to connect with Rose about something, so I went onto Wikipedia (best site in the universe). It turned out the main characters were performed by these two guys, just two guys! Their names were Matt Lucas and David Walliams, and it's amazing what make-up can do to them. Anyway, it turned out the show was really popular. The article talked about the characters and their personalities, and even mentioned some of the sketches they were in. I was reading about a character called Kenny Craig, when:

"Doctor, what's the temperature like on Colbolt 6?" asked Rose from down the hallway. "I don't want to freeze to death, but I don't want a repeat of that time in the Northern Territory when I was down to my bra and panties and still boiling."

_Shame, that was one of my favourite adventures_, I thought. I then hastily grabbed the mouse and closed down the site. However in the process of doing that I must have clicked on an ad. Rose came in.

"Um, you could wear what you've got on now, but maybe bring a jacket," I said.

"Okay," Rose said. "Doctor, what are you doing?"

"Oh, just some research," I replied. Rose raised an eyebrow. I turned to the screen, and my eyes widened. There, in big red letters, were the words SO YOU WANT A PENIS ENLARGEMENT. I quickly closed the page.

"I wasn't looking at that," I said. "It just came up."

"Of course it did Doctor," said Rose, who walked out of the room in laughter.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

About a week later Rose tried to convince me to watch the show again, during a game of Scrabble. I decided it wouldn't hurt, so I gave in. It was the sort of show that did the unexpected. You never predicted the old woman would vomit on the little girl (well, she actually did the same thing every time, but it was a surprise the first time). You never thought the guy in the wheelchair would be perfectly capable of walking, and each time he got out it was still funny. I did feel for the guy looking after him though. Rose didn't.

"Hahahahahahahahaha … oh god I love that," she said. And at some points I joined her in laughter. This was one of my favourite lines:

"_The program has ended a little earlier than usual, because I have to do a poo now."_

It's just so absurd! Mind you, I'm still a Monty Python fan at heart (nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!). But then something happened, something that could have come out of _The Twilight Zone_. I realised who the voiceover sounded like – me! It was the voice of my fourth form! It was so weird hearing what I sounded like. And then we watched a certain scene with subtitles, and it mentioned Davros, the creator of the Daleks! How did they know about it?

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

_Many years earlier_

Davros had tried to direct the Daleks to take over Earth by invading preschools, but the fourth Doctor stopped them. He walked up to a small boy.

"Hello there young man, what's your name?" the Doctor asked.

"I'm David," the boy said.

"David, that's a nice name," the Doctor said. "Would you like a jellybaby David?" Ignoring his mother's advice, David took the candy from the stranger. He'd just saved his life, so he couldn't be all bad.

"Don't worry David, the mean man in the wheelchair won't bother you anymore," the Doctor said.

"Thank you," David said.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

_I'm glad I thought of that ending, it would have been hard to do otherwise. This is the end of the story. For the Doctor's 10th resolution (I will tell Rose I love her), please refer to my fic __**The 10th Resolution**__. See ya, and don't forget to review!_


End file.
